When I came out to my friend it was pretty dry, I just said, “I’m pan,” and she said, “k, I’m bi.” After that my friend dated A LOT of girls so I thought I should too, so I dated a really pretty girl for a while but we broke up at 3 months and I was super sad. I stayed single for a while but found another girlfriend at my school and we started dating. I didn’t tell my friend at first, and then randomly one day my friend texted me that she had a crush on me and I had to tell her that I already had a girlfriend, and she was really sad I didn’t tell her sooner. What should I do? (F/13/Pan)
Story #2167
When I came out it was probably the most nerve-wracking thing I’ve ever done. I told my mom first, and she accepted me fully, but I am yet to tell her I’m Pan instead of bi. I told all of my friends next, and they were supportive too. One of them came out too later on, as a genderfluid lesbian. When I told my father, he said it was a phase, so he’s on my “Salty List” forever. On April 4, I met the most diverse, between gender and sexuality, friends anyone will ever have. They are super supportive, and I couldn’t ask for anything more. To this day, I own more than seven pride items, regardless of my dad’s opinion of me, and who I am. Stay strong my friends! (F/12/Pan/demi)
Story #2155
When I came out it was the other day, and 𝐈 wasn’t even the one to do it. I was laying on the ground in drama class the other day when I heard my preferred name being used in answer to one of the teacher’s questions as to who was doing which role. When the teacher asked who they were, one of my friends replied with: “Oh, that’s *deadname*’s preferred name!” I was scared when I heard this as many kids in my school were transphobic until I heard my teacher ask me which pronouns I use ! She was really supportive, though I am still mad at my friend for outing me 🙁 (Non-binary/agender/12/Pan/demi)
Story #2117
When I came out I was really scared. I have homophobic parents — well, mom — and I had already come out to some of my friends. My brother was my only family member who knew and he helped me through tough times of figuring myself out. I decided to let my mom know I was pansexual and asexual because she always insulted the LGBTQIA+ and I was getting hurt a lot but nothing changed once I came out to her. Instead she said stuff like I’m gross, I’m a sin, it’s just a dumb phase, stuff like that hurt a lot. I don’t have many friends so I would try to just move on with myself and be happy with who I am even though if I really am a disappointment but it’s alright. I’m happy being me and expressing what and who I love. I mean, I can’t help it. (F/15/PanAce)
Story #2111
When I came out I had a few friends I was out to and wanted to tell more, so when one of my friends came out to me, I felt a safe-space was with her. Big mistake for me. I told her (who I no longer trust) and another friend (who is very nice and is still my friend today, very accepting) after school one day and the next I have one of my friends coming up to me saying, “I didn’t know you were bi!” and I freak out. I played it cool, as if I meant for this to happen, trying to make sure others didn’t hear (I had some homophobic “friends” at the time), while having a panic attack and the friend I came out to the day before smirking. I asked her why she told the person who I hadn’t trusted with this secret yet and she told me that I should have told her sooner and that “I just helped you, you had to do it soon.” Later she became VERY homophobic and transphobic and made jokes about being gay, in a very homophobic way. Luckily know I have better friends and she is no longer near me. (Demiboy/Pan/demi)
Story #2090
When I came out I was 11/12, and my friends were pretty supportive. I came out as bi and ace, but pretty recently I realized that I am pan and demi. So now I have to re-come out, and it might be weird. Idk. I have yet to tell my parents. Only my sister knows what I truly am, and she is bi. At least one family member knows how I feel. Now it’s time to tell all the others. Wish me luck! (F/12/Pan)
Story #2085
When I came out in terms of sexuality, it was right after my sister, who’s pan, had come out to me. I told her that I didn’t think I was straight either and I had a crush on a girl, but I never officially told my parents my sexuality. I told my mom I was non-binary as I was going to bed one night, and she was pretty accepting and told my dad for me. I told my sister myself, and she was amazing and supportive. But my parents didn’t really use my preferred name or pronouns at all until a month or so later, when they found out I was struggling with severe depression and anxiety. Then they suddenly became a lot better about it. (Non-Binary/13/Bi/pan)
Story #2083
When I came out I thought I was bisexual. I came out to my (gay) best friend first, and when I told her, she put this super innocent look on, and said, “Anyone in particular?” I came out to almost all my friends as bisexual at a party, and they were all super accepting. I also came out to my mom as bi, and she told me that she was bi as well. But then I realized I was pansexual, and re-came out to my best friend, who was still accepting. I have to come out as pansexual to my friend group, though. (F/Pansexual)
Story #2069
When I came out to my mum about a month and a half ago, she was a bit non-accepting at first and said, “As far as I know, you’re a girl.” That made me sad and disappointed. Later on she came into my room and asked me what was wrong, and I just told her that I thought she doesn’t accept me, but she said she does, which made me really happy. I was too scared to tell my dad and I didn’t want to tell him, but my mum said that he deserved it; she told him that night and he accepted me. Both of my parents knew what non-binary was because I have a non-binary friend and had to explain what it means. All of my friends know and they all support me, and I’m glad I have such great friends and such amazing parents. (Non-binary/15/Pan)
Story #2061
When I came out to my best friend today, I did it over text. Because of the quarantine I won’t be able to see her for almost a month and I just couldn’t keep it in anymore. I texted her a long paragraph telling her that I’m non-binary. She was very accepting and told me she had I feeling I was. (NB/15/Bi/pan)