When I came out, I was already out to most of my school friends as gay, but then I started to question my gender and figured out I was agender. The first few people I came out to were accepting, but they all made a huge deal out of it (it’s just me??? call me by my name and pronouns as you would do anyone else???), and eventually, rumours started floating around the school as they had when I had come out to these same people as gay. This made me quite anxious as I felt that everyone knew my deepest secret. Later when I came out to my class, people kept deadnaming and mispronouning me, saying, ‘Same thing’ or ‘You know what I meant’. Later by the people in my class I got bullied (still am being bullied) and called an ‘it.’ And finally, was outed to a bunch of my teachers: When they called the roll and said my deadname (though I appreciate people learning my real name, it was super annoying) people in my class yelled out (some quite mockingly :((() ‘Actually, it’s *real name.*’ And as I’m not currently out to my mum, this was quite distressing as some of the teachers are friends with and talk with my mum often. 🙁 (Agender/non-binary/13/Aromantic/pansexual/demisexual)
Story #2172
When I came out I felt awkward. I had previously come out as asexual, only to realize I’m an aromantic lesbian. My mum guessed it, but I still feel like she doesn’t accept me. (F/14)
Story #2105
When I came out as aroace I first came out to my classmate/friend. I told her I thought I was aroace, but she laughed and made fun of me, saying I was way too young to know and just confused. The next day I came out to my mum that night after she asked me if I was gay, and I told her no. I told her that I just didn’t like anybody and that that would probably be forever like that. She was first off sad because she thought that I would be unhappy that way. I told her that I’m happy with friends and family and that if I would be in a relationship, it would make me unhappy. She accepted it, so I told her that I was probably aroace. She accepted that too. (Genderfluid/13/Aroace)
Story #2030
When I came out as aromantic my mom said that it was just a phase and that I would find “the one.” My friends are supportive, though, which is awesome. (Genderfluid/aroace)
Story #2019
When I came out to my parents for the first time, as asexual, I was 14. They’re very cishet-normative, but they’ve been trying to be very supportive. Tonight, I put a letter on their bed saying I am nonbinary. I don’t know if they’ve read it yet. Tomorrow, I’m
going to come out to my younger brother. I’m scared, but I’m also tired of pretending to be something I’m not. I hope they respond well. (Nonbinary/16/Aroace, agender)
Story #1801
When I came out I was 14. I have a close friend-group that are all queer and really open-minded, so it was easy to tell them. However, my family was another story. I had a whole plan on how to come out, but in the end it wasn’t necessary, because my mother already knew, so I kind of just blurted everything out. My mom is accepting and supports me, but my sister and step-dad are very conservative, but I know they’ll come around. (Trans[FtM]/15/Asexual [aromantic])
Story #1751
When I came out, I told my mom one late night and she said that she understood, but after a week of not referring to me by any name at all she’s back at it again to using my dead one. (Non-binary/16/Aroace)
Story #1707
When I came out, it was sort of by mistake. My friends were talking about some movie, and my friend told me, “From one asexual to another, don’t watch that movie because there’s a huge sex scene.” I responded that I wasn’t ace, and she seemed really surprised. I couldn’t shake the encounter, though, and at lunch the next day, I looked up different types of attraction and realized that I really didn’t experience any sexual attraction, prompting me to come out to everyone right then and there. They were all so accepting, and they’ve continued to be as my label has gradually changed and evolved into how I identify today. (Agender/15/Aro Ace)
Story #1367
When I came out, I came out on my 15th birthday on 12/25/16 to several of my cousins and my one sister. I ended up learning one was lesbian and another was bisexual. They were all very supportive, but I’m not going to tell my parents or classmates yet. I came out as lesbian and aromantic, but honestly I am still lost and confused in the asexuality spectrum.