When I came out to myself, it was a long process. I started having a crush on my female best friend and thought I was bi. I soon discovered pansexuality and clicked. I stayed in the closet for months before casually texting my very Christian friend that I didn’t know if I would marry a boy or a girl. We never discussed lqbtq things before so I didn’t want to include nonbinary people as well in case she didn’t know who they were. She hasn’t answered yet. If you want to come out, do it! There will always be people to support you. 🏳️🌈 (F/demigirl?/11/Pansexual/demisexual)
Story #2262
When I came out to my friends as transgender they were very chill and very supportive of me. When I came out to my parents, they weren’t as accepting ( I came out to them when I was around 8 or 9). They kept trying to tell me that I was born a girl and always will be a girl. After this experience, I never wanted to talk to them about the lgbtq+ stuff because no matter what they always shut me down. I finally figured out sometime in January that I wasn’t trans but I was genderfluid and pansexual. My friends, again, were amazing about it, and after I told them one of them came out as bi to me. I aways felt really bad that I said I was trans and then later changed my pronouns but it’s okay if you come out as something and then later change it. I haven’t told my parents yet but I am planning to once I move out and all of that stuff. (Genderfluid/12/Pansexual)
Story #2261
When I came out, I did it over text to my friend, and she was fine with it and cheered me on. I have never been more grateful. (Non-binary/12/Pansexual)
Story #2254
When I came out I realized how misunderstood enbies are. I had to explain almost every aspect of my gender identity and sexuality to my parents and friends, and reassure them that we actually exist. There are just so few of us, apparently, that not even close to everyone knows the basics of our gender (or anti-gender) self-concepts. Stay strong, and don’t let “normal society” get to you. Just be yourself, be modest, and be kind. (Non-binary agender/15/Pansexual)
Story #2245
When I came out, everyone was super supportive. I am so lucky to be in a community of friends (in boarding school) where almost everyone is also LGBTQ+. When I came out to my friends here, they all were so happy and now we are forming a coalition to help my roommate begin questioning her sexuality, as we both come from pretty rural conservative towns and hadn’t really thought about it before. I still haven’t come out to my family at home yet, and am pretty nervous but am glad I have my friends here and at home (who I came out to over a Zoom call; they were very supportive and happy as well) to support me. I am planning to tell my brother first, as I know he will be accepting and knows more about LGBTQ+ than my parents, who are more of the accepting of their gay coworkers but very awkward around anything gay type, and I don’t really know how they will react. (F/14/Pansexual)
Story #2235
When I came out to my sister, it was right after she had come out to me as asexual and omni! We were both very loving and supporting of each other and still are! (Scared to tell my mom though. Might wait till I move out and go to college.) (Genderfluid/10/Pretty sure I’m pansexual but still questioning)
Story #2233
When I came out it was a little sudden; the first time I understood the term pan while trying to figure myself out I felt immediately like that was me. Then one day after school some of my friends were asking about whether I had a crush and somehow the conversation went from me protesting embarrassedly that “it’s complicated” to me saying “So I’m pan” as we got on the bus. My friends were gay and trans; and lesbian; so they both were really accepting. It was relieving to finally let somebody know how I felt. I’ve told my mum that “I could see myself with a girlfriend or boyfriend” (in tears) but she said she understood, but she and my dad were both pretty confident I’d “settle down and figure it out” so I don’t think she knows that pan is actually a real thing. I’ll tell her one day soon and explain it fully but right now I think I’ll let her think about it a while longer… (F/15/Pan)
Story #2232
When I came out it was “census day.” I filled out my census on my household account, not realising that when my parents logged in to do theirs, they’d be able to see all of my answers. To cut a long story short, I’m looking for a new house, and I’m going to hell too apparently. (F/18/Pansexual)
[Editor’s note: UK folks, you can go to https://census.gov.uk and click “Need to answer separately from your household?” and they’ll send you an anonymous access code so you can fill in your own information and overwrite whatever your official household form says.]
Story #2226
When I came out to my best friend it was right after he hit on me and said he liked me. I was so scared but then he told me he was bi. Now I have a beautiful trans girlfriend and my friend has a boyfriend! (F/12/Pan)
Story #2224
When I came out I was just 11. I came out to a friend and they were super supportive. I was planning to come out in June, but it came out early. It was by email and I was super worried they would be homophobic or not supportive at all, but I was wrong. Remember, you’re never alone. (F/11/Pansexual)