When I came out, I did it in a letter, writing it online and then showing it to my parents from my computer. The first thing they both said was that they knew, and they had read my messages to my friends — I had come out to my friends gradually and explained it fully to them that day. It was a bit of a stressful process because my parents sat me down and asked me every question they could (my anxiety made me really stressed out so I was crying), and it took a while for them to adjust. My parents say they try with pronouns, but they also say that “my generation labels ourselves too much and they don’t have to use my preferred pronouns because of that”. They’re super supportive of other people but have a hard time adjusting to me (even three years later). However, my friends are amazingly supportive and ask me my pronouns each day – for other genderfluid kids: you are loved and valid and supported and should find your people who love you. (Genderfluid/15/Panromantic/asexual)
Story #2554
When I came out at the age of 15, things got a bit chaotic. My stepdad was a conservative man who worked in the business industry and when I told him I was lesbian, he was upset and didn’t talk to me for the next two or three weeks. My mom, on the other hand, was super supportive because she was bisexual. After a few years, I identified as panromantic and my stepdad just lost it and severed ties with me. My mom supports me to this very day, though. (F/29/Panromantic)
Story #2428
When I came out to my Bi best friend recently, Ze was really supportive! I am planning to come out to my other two best friends on my birthday. They all support the LGBTQIAP+ community, but there’s a few of my other best friends who I don’t think I’ll ever come out to, because they’d be really weird about it. Just a piece of advice, don’t feel like you have to come out to anyone (at all). The only person you owe it to is yourself. (Demigirl/Maybe panromantic or greysexual)
Story #2426
When I came out, it was a roller-coaster year and a half, because my identity changed several times, first Pansexual and Nonbinary, then Bigender and Pansexual, then Bigender and Panromantic-Asexual. However, not just my gender and sexuality was a roller-coaster; my pronouns were too. I went from They/Them to He/They, then back to They/Them. Luckily my name journey was easy, I just chose a neutral version of my birth name. Anyways, to all of you out there questioning yourselves, the process is a journey, but it is worth it in the end. (Bigender/19/Panromantic-Asexual)
Story #2425
When I came out it was to a close friend. They proceeded to tell me they’re genderfluid. Now we’re super close. To everyone out there, find your one. (Nonbinary/12/Panromantic)
Story #2419
When I came out it was to my older sister. I told her I liked this girl (I’m a girl) and she took my hand and told me she loved me and everything was still the same. I asked her if she was surprised and she responded saying it wouldn’t be fair to be surprised. After the conversation ended, I felt so vulnerable and immediately regretted telling her, but now 8 months later I’ve told two more of my friends and hope to continue to come out slowly to everyone important in my life. Every time it’s painful, but I know it’s important to keep doing it so I learn to accept and love myself as much as the people around me do. (F/16/Panromantic asexual cisfemale)
Story #2414
When I came out to my sister and my parents last year, I was 40 years old. It was a very long time coming working out my sexuality, having previously felt very confused and like I was broken since I was a teenager. I grew up during Section 28 in the UK when sexuality was a banned topic in schools, not to mention that asexuality was just not even ‘a thing’; even when I did first hear the term I didn’t think it applied to me as I had no idea of the whole asexuality spectrum. It feels great to finally understand myself and to not feel so alone. I’m still a mixture of jumbled up emotions and feel ‘exposed’ as if I’ve released a deeply held secret to the world and I’m going to be caught out somehow but I have lots of hope that these will subside and happiness at being my authentic true self to my friends and family will take over. (F/40/Panromantic asexual)
Story #2411
When I came out, my dad did most of the work for me. Music was playing and my dad brought up that I had something in common with a famous artist. I asked what he meant and he said that we were both pan. I’m really glad because I don’t have enough confidence to do it myself. (Girlflux?/11/Ace/pan)
Story #2401
When I came out I was about 13. I told my friends first, who were all really accepting, given some of them were LGBTQ+ as well, and my sister had known for a while as well, and she was lesbian. I came out to my parents a while later about my sexuality, by baking a cake – they were fine with it too, even though they don’t know about me being agender yet. For anyone who’s having a hard time or isn’t accepted, keep going!! One day you’ll find someone, either a friend or a partner, who loves you just the way you are. (Agender/Demipanromantic Graysexual)
Story #2387
When I came out I was 13. My friend and I were playing truth or dare and she asked me if I could date anyone in our school who would it be? I answered by telling her that I was Asexual Grey Panromantic. She was cool with it and just asked me what that is. After I told her she proceeded to tell me about her lesbian friend, so I don’t think she completely understood. I haven’t told anyone else yet. I am also yet to come out as genderfluid. I think my family will take it well because I have a gay uncle and a trans uncle too. (Genderfluid/13/Asexual grey panromantic)