When I came out, or rather was outed, I was 19 and having the time of my life with my first girlfriend in Miami. I was in college at the time and basically skipped town to spend time with her, and I tweeted how happy I was with my girlfriend and sharing moments of our time together. My mom (who lived in California at the time) logged into my account and saw everything — a complete invasion of my privacy, violation of boundaries and trust. My family is super homophobic so of course I never told them about the happiness and love I’d found. She called me to tell me she knew where I was at, who I was with, and informed me she knew about my sexuality. The fact that she took that opportunity from me and contributed to years of shame and guilt was unforgivable tbh. Eight years have passed and I haven’t been in a relationship since. Finally at a point in my life where I couldn’t give a single solitary f*ck and will love and be with who I choose no matter who likes it. Not compromising my happiness and emotional / mental health for anybody any longer. (GNC/27/Lesbian)
Story #1990
When I came out I was 27 and in an online long-distance relationship with a man whom I was about to meet for the first time in two years (no video chat back then). Feeling confused and trapped at the thought of an IRL interaction, I first told my counselor (who is lesbian) hoping she would help me figure out what was wrong with me but surprisingly, she mocked me. So, upon the return of a blunderingly exhausting trip of avoiding his advances in every way and once again being able to hide behind the safety of my computer monitor, I ungracefully told him that I was attracted to a whole list of actresses and cowardly asked if he understood what that meant. Obviously he got very angry, told me I was wasting his time, that the last two years had meant nothing, and that I was not trying hard enough to love him. We never spoke again but I hope he found real love and is happy. (F/50/Lesbian)
Story #1989
When I came out I told many of my friends. They either support me or don’t care; most support me though. I plan in making a LGBTQ club in my school soon, to show people there is a safe place to come for LGBTQ people. I bought two LGBTQ+ flags, one of LGBTQ and one bisexual one. I had the LGBTQ one hanging in the center of my room and I accidentally left my door open; my mom actually saw it and asked about it, if I knew what it meant and if I was any of those, and I explained I was bisexual and that I was terrified to tell cause I thought she wouldn’t accept me and she accepted me. I started to break into tears hearing she was OK with it. I’m bringing my bisexual flag to my dad and seeing what happens after that. (F/13/Bisexual)
Story #1988
When I came out I was 13 years old. I only came out to one person, but it was one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever done. I texted my friend, who is Bi, and just kind of said “So I’m Bi…” After that I threw my phone on the bed and didn’t check my messages for at least 10 minutes. When I did check it all she had said was “Cool! :)” Even though it was such a small response, it made me so happy to finally be out to someone and have them accept me. (F/14/Bisexual)
Story #1987
When I came out, I was 12. This still makes me cringe, but it was 11PM and I was bored and was watching coming out videos. I was feeling brave and since my sister was asleep I just texted her that I was gay so she could see it in the morning. There was some awkward tension at first but we never really talk about it. (M/13/Gay)
Story #1986
When I came out yesterday night it was to my best friend (who I have known for 7 years). On Instagram I wrote to him telling him I was gay. I switched off the phone and went to bed, but didn’t get much sleep cause my heart was racing. When I woke up the first thing I did was see his message. I was scared thinking I would lose him, but once again I underestimated his awesomeness. He was truly supportive and I am happy to have him in my life. Thanks. (M/15/Gay)
Story #1985
When I came out it was a total accident. I had already come out to my closest friends but my classmates didn’t know. I was sitting in class and the boy in front of me used gay as an insult. I was p*ssed so I said, “Don’t say that” and he turned around and said “What, are you gay?” And I said, “Well, yes, I am!” That shut him up. And that’s how I came out to my entire class. (F/15/Bisexual/pansexual)
Story #1984
When I came out to my father I was basically disowned. He had been using the possibility of me being gay as a vicious point scoring tirade against my mother during a drawn out and violent divorce. On the day they separated and we all moved out and away, I ended up in a heated argument with him, which lead to me saying in effect I was gay. He said I was no son of his and was siding with my mother. I hardly saw him after that as could not cope with the pain of the divorce and maybe because I felt massively rejected. I never had a chance to reconcile or further discuss the issue as he died a few years later. When I tried coming out to my mother I remembered her crying secretly and also during a conversation about my coming out to a friend while I was in the same house. I still don’t know if he fully understands or accepts I’m gay. (M/45/Gay)
Story #1983
When I came out I was about 11, but you know hormones, and my mom didn’t believe me and said it was a phase. Well, I have a girlfriend now (I’m 17) and we kept this in secret but yeah, they know about it. I came out again as lesbian two weeks ago and they said they love me no matter what, and hope that people are going to treat me right. (F/17/Lesbian)
Story #1982
When I came out to a few of my friends they were all super supportive of me, and it turned out that all but one of them were LGBTQ+ too! The one friend is now my girlfriend. She accepts me for who I am and uses my proper pronouns and chosen name. I have bad anxiety so I’m too scared to come out to my parents anytime soon because they’re SUPER religious and biphobic . Although I am not so glad that I came out to my friends because one couldn’t shut their mouth. (F/11/Bi)