When I Came Out

When I came out to my friend last night we were both drunk. His first reaction wasn’t to assume that I liked him. He asked if I thought he was attractive and I told him yes and he said he was sorry he wasn’t gay or bi but that he appreciated the compliment.

When I came out as asexual to my cousin, he asked what it meant, listened carefully, and said that since he couldn’t imagine not being straight, I couldn’t be asexual. When I came out to my best friend, she told me asexuality wasn’t evolutionarily advantageous. When I came out to my brother, he just worried that I might take longer to find a relationship and feel lonely in the meantime. When I came out to my mother, she said that explained why she hadn’t been able tell if I was gay or not. I still talk to two of the four.

Really, it’s all been pretty anticlimactic.

When I came out I was 18 and I told a close friend and she said that just as long as I’m happy then who cares. I also told an uncle I was close to but that one did not go well; he disowned me and we still don’t talk and that was 15 years ago, but I still go by what I was told: “as long as I’m happy then to be what I am” then the others that don’t like it can just lump it.

When I came out as lesbian I was having a hard time accepting myself. I told a good friend in an email that I figured out I was homosexual and she was really supportive. There have been highs and lows ever since, some friendships strengthened, others fell into pieces. “If your friends don’t accept you, they are not your friends.” – I have read this a dozen times before it actually happened to me, and I was terrified of losing friends, but now it is ok. They really weren’t my friends.

When I came out (about an hour ago), my mother told me it was fine. That there were plenty of arty and creative types like me that were gay. I’m 15 and can’t believe I was so stupid. But I’m incredibly glad that I did.

When I came out, it was to my brothers. I told them I was bisexual and one of them said, “Make sure your girlfriend is cute.” A year later, I came out to them as a lesbian by playing them “The Gay Song.” They are still accepting, and I couldn’t be happier! I have yet to come out to most friends and my parents.

When I came out, I was 49 years old. I’d been married twice, never happily, because in the back of my befuddled mind, I really loved girls. I came out to lesbian friends first, to my three sons, two (out of five) brothers, and my parents next. After all these years I no longer carry the burden of hiding in the closet. I plan on living loud and proud. Finally.

When I came out to my real dad the whole day I was crying. I was thinking to myself Is he gonna accept me for who I am or is he gonna push me away. Well I got the balls to tell him and he told me, “Yes you are my baby girl and regardless if you straight or gay I will accept you for you.” :’)

When I came out, it was almost two weeks ago. I was sitting in a car with two guy friends when suddenly one of them said he didn’t know anyone who was gay only two bisexuals … Then I told him “now you do” both were like “really?” then just “cool” and the conversation continued like before. They’re really awesome and I was nervous because I haven’t known them for so long 🙂

When I came out to my parents they were nothing but positive and loving. After that I spent the rest of my day driving to all of my friends’ houses on a sort of coming out marathon. I have never felt more loved; I should have done it sooner.