When I came out, I told my friends first (many of whom are gay) and they automatically supported me, no questions asked. When I finally decided to come out to my parents half a year later after I found my identity, I composed a lengthy text message and sent it to them both while they were out of the house. When they came home, we had a talk in my bedroom–and my Christian parents just hugged me and said, “We love you–so love who you love.” I started crying because I was afraid they wouldn’t accept me…and yet they did. (Non-binary/Pansexual)
Story #2471
When I came out to my mother as nonbinary (she already knew I liked girls; this was before I figured out I was oriented aroace and liked nonbinary peeps too), she seemed okay with it and actually sort of seemed like she already suspected. My stepfather came into the same room about half way through to make a fire, and my mom just kept talking about it even though I didn’t want him to hear because he has said some questionable things about trans people in the past. He definitely heard the conversation, but didn’t comment, didn’t talk to me, and just kept sighing and rolling his eyes. He hasn’t brought it up since; in fact, he seems to call me a girl every chance he gets (practically in every sentence e.g. “You’re a smart girl…”, “Come on, girl!”, etc.), and my mom also calls me a girl and doesn’t use they/them pronouns with me. I’m still figuring out whether I should bring it up with them, come out to my stepfather properly, or if I wasn’t explicit enough. (Nonbinary-Trans and Agenspec Polygender/11/Omniaspec Enbitrix Oriented Aroace)
Story #2470
When I came out, it was back in January. I have actually documented my story not too long ago, but that was before I came out to my dad and sister. Me and family were going to a pride parade (my first one!!) and before we left, I sat my dad down, showed him my flag, and told him I was aroace. He said that he kinda knew already because of my disinterest in romance. He said he obviously still loved me and didn’t say anything that I was too young because he knows that I know best. I was so happy! When I went to the parade, my sister noticed it but didn’t ask about it. Just remember you’re valid! And to my ace-spec and aro-spec fam: You are totally part of the community! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! (F/13/Aroace)
Story #2469
When I came out I first told my friend. I had already told her that I was a lesbian so it wasn’t that hard. Then I said it to my sister that gay too. They all accepted me. It took me long time to tell my parents and everyone is being supportive. But no remembers to use my real name and that makes me uncomfortable. (Non-binary/12)
Story #2468
When I came out I was 9, and before that I never realized that there were other genders or loves. It only came to my mind when my now best friend moved across the street and one of her older siblings was non-binary and I was like, that’s a thing! I realized that was how I felt and I told my best friend, then I sat my parents down and said, “I’m non-binary.” They were like, “Okay” and they have been super supportive ever since. (Non-binary/12/Pansexual)
Story #2467
When I came out I was scared. I’ve struggled with my identity since I was 8 years old. Thankfully earlier that year my cousin came to visit and told my mother that they now use they/them and identify as nonbinary. Though my mom didn’t really understand she tried her best to be supportive and use the correct pronouns. They gave me courage to finally come out after all these years to tell her I’m a boy. She was pretty taken back and disappointed I didn’t tell her sooner but she’s trying her hardest to understand and is really supportive. I do feel guilty though as she adopted a daughter and not a son but I hope she still sees me as her child no matter what. She doesn’t use my correct name and pronouns yet but she says she wants to try and wants me to be comfortable. (TransMale/18)
Story #2466
When I came out, it was to a close friend. She had just come out to me as bisexual a week or so earlier, and I had already told them about being aroace, so I knew she was part of the community. She texted me to tell me she was actually a lesbian, and I responded cool, then I asked them what they would do about non binary pronouns. She said she would use their real pronouns, and asked, ‘hey, aren’t you nb too? I’m actually a demigirl.’ Her support also helped me tell another one of my friends. Hopefully you all can find your people who will support you. (NONBINARY/I HAVE NO GENDER ONLY RAGE/14/Aromantic Asexual Agender Nonbinary Trans [FtNB])
Story #2465
When I came out to my friend whom I have known since daycare it was very hard because I hadn’t come out in a while. When I was in my room with him (I have not seen him in two years), and I was playing with a doll he said, “That is some ‘gay sh*t'” and I replied “That’s me,” and he asked “You’re gay?” in a snarky voice, and I said, “Well, actually I’m non-binary” as I ran to the bathroom. I was thinking how he uses “gay” as an insult and how he is the exact boy I would NOT hang out with, but luckily all my other friends and family are really accepting. (Nonbinary/12)
Story #2464
When I came out to my family, I was in an arranged marriage with my husband. I didn’t feel very comfortable when I was young and I was living in an unaccepting family even though I hadn’t come out, yet . I had a friend who was trans and they would never call them by their real name and they eventually banned me from talking about them. When I got older I ignored my feelings but once I had my second child I was really feeling out of place. I talked to one of my distant cousins who was gay. I figured out my real feelings and in my realization, I had an affair with one of my lesbian friends from college. When my husband found out he was very angry but also understanding about my sexuality and later came out as pan. This was a very emotional time of my life but I eventually got through it and married the woman of my dreams (college wifey). (F/56/Lesbian)
Story #2463
When I came out to my grandparents about being nonbinary and having a new name, they said, “Oh (dead name), we will always support you. Won’t we support HIM?” (talking to grandpa). It made me feel uncomfortable about being nonbinary and I did not even correct them. I came out when I was 6, and they still make mistakes now. (Nonbinary/12)